Demoralization: What Happens When We Feel Like Giving Up

Sometimes the world seems so dark – it almost feels hopeless…

I don’t write opinionated reflections a lot. Most of the time I try to give readers real videos, transcripts, documents about what was said by either those in charge of certain projects, or whistleblowers exposing plans, or testimonies from others who describe their experience that people need to be aware about.

While I do have my opinions and share them throughout my posts, I very rarely spend a whole post describing my emotions as I go through them.

However, admittedly, the disheartening news all around us can sometimes be overwhelming and the future extremely bleak, which casts a dark shadow of pointlessness to even pursuing these subjects any longer. Sometimes, knowing all of the atrocities going on around us, it’s easy to get lost amid a sea of hopelessness.

We see those responsible for heinous crimes constantly getting away with it, and not only that, celebrating vacations, weddings, and get-togethers with their cohorts and their ilk; while the rest of us remain under the oppressive regime of mandates, vaccine/mask narratives, and constant scrutiny if we show the littlest bit of hesitancy towards these agendas.

Seeing the people who should be behind bars living it up and able to travel freely on their private yachts and/or jets, while those simply trying to make an honest living are left either quitting their jobs/careers to refuse the vaccine mandate, or getting fired for refusing to comply – or they cave into the demands of the system and get the vaccine unwillingly to keep their job or just so that they can travel – which has ultimately sadly led to many unnecessary and tragic adverse events.

Seeing pictures of the “elite” group gathering around in large festivities and celebrations/meetings without any social distancing or masks to speak of, while the workers and camera crew catering to them are wearing masks. Clearly indicating that the “elites” are not worried about contracting ANYTHING, much less COVID, but yet they demand that the useless eaterstheir slaves… their employees wear a mask around them.

Seeing countless videos of politicians, celebrities, diplomatic leaders faking a vaccine, while encouraging, bribing and/or berating others to get it. Calling those who refuse to get it a “selfish fool” who doesn’t care about grandma.

Watching as hundreds and thousands of doctors, nurses, healthcare workers, scientists, etc. speak up against the vaccine – yet people are still refusing to listen to them, and instead continue to listen to the mainstream media and government funded doctors – like Anthony Fauci.

Seeing doctors and heads of the vaccine group (NIH, CDC, FDA, Pfizer, etc.) continuously lie to the public about the vaccine’s efficacy, or lack thereof, and the completely inane push to administer even more of the vaccine that didn’t work the first, second or third time around.

Learning about the terrible situation involving the suppression of Ivermectin – meanwhile hundreds of those in Congress are allegedly secretly getting treated with this medication – while those in charge of the coronavirus task force prevent its use in pharmacies worldwide and hospitals refuse to treat patients with it, at the same time the MSM continues to ridicule the concept by labeling it a “horsepaste”…

All of this outrageous deception and manipulation and utter clown show – within the span of less than 2 years – because a large group of people still can’t wake up to the obvious lies and endless dictatorship that’s edging ever closer to becoming a normality because people would rather continue to believe the lie and a modicum of comfort, compared to opening their eyes and seeing the huge, dystopian overhaul that tptsb have planned for us.

All of it is not only discouraging, it’s also downright depressing.

So sometimes I find myself sitting down in exhaustion, hard to find myself even moving because that would mean the reality around us is still in full effect, so by choosing to not move perhaps I can take myself out of this reality for a little bit and just exist without participating in the world that I have grown increasingly more disappointed in.

I just sit there, contemplating life, or even not thinking at all – wondering how no matter how much proof is around us, some people will still refuse to see it. It doesn’t mean it’s not there, it’s that people will refuse to connect the dots and insist that it’s just happenstance, a coincidence, nothing to be alarmed about, and so on and so forth. Their refusal to believe it doesn’t mean that it’s a ridiculous concept, but it’s more that they can’t handle it if they were to find out what the world is REALLY about, because it would mean their whole lives (all of ours) is one giant lie built on a foundation of horror and wickedness.

Or, they simply don’t care. They are so comfortable in the system, that to question it would upset their whole way of life and they rather enjoy living under governmental rule, because it allows someone else to think for them. They are indoctrinated into the system so badly that anyone resisting this type of regime is automatically seen as the “bad guy”. The plot to The Matrix playing out in real time.

So once in a while, I catch myself in utter despair, not wanting to continue on in my attempts at waking others up. They will either see the truth for what it is, or they will continue to ignore the “world” for what it really is. The Lord will call on those He chooses, while those who remain in the dark may forever be lost.

But then I remember how God did indeed call me out of this world. He led me to Him, because I was not the most pristine of followers – or a follower at all, at that point. I was a lost soul like so many others. I did not pray. I did not go to church. I did not read the Bible. As a matter of fact, I shunned the Bible. So to say that He literally called me out of this world would not be an exaggeration.

And who was there when I was questioning what was happening to me? When I went to search for an answer as to what these signs and synchronicities were, how did I finally find my answer that I wasn’t just a crazy person who heard God’s voice – but actually heard Him and He’s the one we are supposed to seek if we want to find Truth?

I found this out by other people, on their own journey, and reading/listening about their own testimonies, and their walk that brought them to the same conclusion. Even though they were at risk of ridicule, scorn, derision, etc., they still came forth to share their experiences on how they got called out of this world – perhaps on their own quest to also wake up others and help them when they choose to seek these answers out for themselves.

And so I am utterly grateful for these people who went against the grain and spoke up to help others who are on their own individual journey – those who may be slowly waking up out of this stupor created solely to keep us from seeking our true purpose – and it reminds me that even if people do not wake up NOW, then the trajectory that we are heading – with God at the helm, will indeed slowly but surely reach out to others, waking them up in their own time, until every single one of us experiences a conscious awakening – and we collectively realize who we really are and take the necessary steps to ensure a future of peace and happiness, instead of the chaos and panic that the “global elites” are trying to dictate upon the world.

I remind myself that I was as lost as many others not so long ago – and I wonder at how those who were already awake at the time felt about people like me. Perhaps growing frustrated that while they could see the evil overtaking the world, people like me at the time were still blissfully unaware in our own little bubble – happily going on about our own lives without a care in the world. Enjoying movies, hanging out with friends, gossiping, going to work, etc., etc., etc. Fully asleep, fully ignorant to the wickedness growing increasingly more brazen as time rolls on.

Perhaps this is part of the “plan”. As the depravity grows, those who are even deep asleep have no choice but to wake up, otherwise they are knowingly participating in the corruption and immorality that has been surrounding us and deceptively trying to get the population to be an active part of. Trying to normalize mandatory drugs/vaccines, transgenderism, transhumanism, pedophilia, critical race theory, satanism, abortions, genetically modifying everything – including humans, reverse aging by transfusing “young blood”, etc., etc., etc…

There is no doubt in my mind that evil has a stranglehold in the world. And time is running out for people to wake up. Perhaps this is why I sometimes have fear strike in my heart – seeing the amount of godlessness pervading practically every aspect of our society – but then I remember that God IS ultimately in control, and I remember my faith, and I remember how lost and clueless I was before waking up to this depravity, and I remember all of the people who have helped me along the way to make sense of our reality and who were awake for years and years and years before I was.

And all I can say is, thank GOD for them.

So when I feel like giving up, and find myself asking, “What’s the point?”, I remember God and all those who were awake long before I was, who had the patience and endurance to continue on, planting the seeds and graciously helping others who haven’t quite woken up out of the matrix yet. While they may have had similar feelings of hopelessness at points, their love for God and for humanity kept them going. I remember Jesus Christ, who literally spread the gospel of love and forgiveness, even up to the point of his persecution and death, by the very same people He was trying to save.

And so knowing all of this, there’s no way I can give up. While despair sometimes strikes, I am reminded of the many good people in the world, working hard to wake others and/or planting the seed for those who were lost but are now seeking the right path. I am reminded of my own shortcomings and my own dismissal of certain “conspiracy theories”, that after an honest look at it objectively, found myself to be completely in the wrong.

I take heart knowing that just because someone is lost now, that doesn’t mean that they aren’t on their own journey into waking up; and I take heart knowing that there are brave and caring souls speaking up on others behalf, helping to spread awareness to reach others.

And I am thankful for all of my readers, whether they have stumbled across here by accident, or are actively seeking the truth as well. You are a blessing, whether you realize it or not. We are all in this together, and try as the corrupt establishment might to demoralize us, I have faith in God and humanity’s will to persevere.

I love you all. God bless.

Heartbreaking Testimony: Pulmonary Nurse of 31 Years Testifies How He Followed the COVID Protocols, Unknowingly that They Could Result in the Deaths of Patients

” – they gas themselves to death. And I’m the guy who was pushing the buttons.”

This article has been cross-posted from globalresearch.ca
Written by Brian Shilhavy / Health Impact News (September 22, 2021)

All Global Research articles can be read in 51 languages by activating the “Translate Website” drop down menu on the top banner of our home page (Desktop version).

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Albert Spence is a pulmonary nurse with 31 years of experience. He recently gave public testimony before the South Carolina State Legislature on “therapeutic options” for COVID-19.

Once again, we are finding that nurses who have been working on the frontlines treating COVID-19 patients are the most informed people in the U.S. right now who truly know what is going on in the hospitals, especially when it comes to COVID-19 protocols, and the experimental COVID-19 “vaccines.”

We absolutely need to be listening to these frontline workers right now instead of the talking head “doctors” on TV who never actually treat patients, if we truly want to know what the truth is. Wall Street and the pharmaceutical industry now control the corporate media, and they will never publish testimonies like this, even though it is public knowledge now having been recorded by the South Carolina legislature.

In this public testimony, Mr. Spence relates how he followed all the advice in the beginning of how the medical system wanted him to treat COVID patients, even though so much of it went against his 30+ years of experience in treating patients with respiratory illnesses.

But when the COVID patients started dwindling down in his ward at the beginning of this year, and he found out that the CDC had changed the threshold for PCR tests by reducing the tests from 40 cycles to 28, then he realized what was happening, and it horrified him.

He had been unwittingly assisting in killing his patients by just “doing what I was told.” He now knows that these patients were dying from the COVID protocols, and not COVID-19.

I lost sleep over it. I was having chest pain over it. It woke me up in the middle of the night – hit me hard. I could not sleep.

Because my first week or two there (COVID ward), I didn’t lead them to the gate, but I’m the guy that euthanized people.

They call it “comfort care.” But when you get to the point where you can’t take (oxygen mask) off, you get so upset. You haven’t seen your family except through maybe an iPad, in weeks.

And you’re never going to come off the high flow, and the doctor says: “You’ve done your best. But this is going to be it for you.”

And so the patients get all teary eyed and upset, and they call in the palliative team, and they all hold their hands and cry.

But they said: “We can keep you comfortable.”

Here comes Albert (referring to himself). He’s got the morphine and ativan, and I load them up and take off the high flow, and they gas themselves to death.

And I’m the guy who was pushing the buttons, like in the gas chambers at Auschwitz.

This is from our Bitchute channel, and it is also on our Rumble channel.

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Notes from Expanding Awareness Relations:

It’s interesting how Albert Spence mentions how there have been regular/normal treatments and protocol that they usually follow when dealing with pneumonia/respiratory/bronchitis-like illnesses, yet during the “COVID crisis”, all of these protocols were thrown out the window and the exact opposite was initiated.

Albert Spence admits that he was just following protocol. And was happy to do so because he trusted the protocols coming down from the CDC/NIH/FDA – AT FIRST.  While he has been a nurse for many years, his direct knowledge on respiratory viruses is limited, which he himself admits. However, having many years of experience and seeing what normally works as opposed to what doesn’t, even he starts questioning the suspicious changes to the guidelines once COVID hits.

There have been many renowned experts in their field that have spoken up about these vaccines as well, and while Mr. Spence may not have this medical expertise, he is still aware of and has first-hand account of the malfeasance and obvious corruption in the health/medical industry. He saw, with direct contact of these patients and in-person experience in the hospitals, what these “protocols” were really designed to do.

Another important subject to consider that Mr. Spence brings up, is HAP (hospital acquired pneumonia) or HCAP (healthcare associated pneumonia):

Background: Traditionally, pneumonia developing in patients who receive healthcare services in the outpatient environment has been classified as community-acquired pneumonia (CAP). However, recent investigations suggest that this type of infection, known as healthcare-associated pneumonia (HCAP), is distinct from CAP in terms of its epidemiology, etiology, and risk for infection with multidrug-resistant (MDR) pathogens.

Results: Analysis of multi-institutional clinical data showed that mortality in hospitalized patients with HCAP is greater than that in CAP, and patients with HCAP received inappropriate initial empiric antibiotic treatment more frequently than CAP patients. The bacterial pathogens associated with HCAP also differed from CAP with potentially MDR Gram-positive and Gram-negative bacteria being more common in HCAP.

Conclusions: All patients hospitalized with suspected HCAP should be evaluated for their underlying risk of infection with MDR pathogens. Because HCAP is similar to hospital-acquired pneumonia (HAP), both clinically and etiologically, it should be treated as HAP until culture data become available.”

Source: [ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21616695/ ] / ” Healthcare-associated pneumonia: diagnostic criteria and distinction from community-acquired pneumonia”

With that being said, have we been seeing the deliberate inundation of inducing pneumonia-related symptoms in potential patients, just to drive the number of “COVID” cases up? Enough to egregiously trick the healthcare employees to unknowingly commit murder on these innocent patients all for the industry’s political/financial gain? And with that, leading to their main goal, which is tricking the population into believing that a “vaccine” is the only thing everyone needs to stay safe and return to normal?

Keep in mind that at the same time, “they” are censoring and defaming actual proven treatments that actually DO benefit their patients. Not to mention preventing them from getting up, getting fresh air, getting vitamins, getting sunlight, getting hugs from their loved ones… no, instead they are inhibiting these incredibly important aspects of human physiology and nature.

One has to wonder, why would they be denouncing and banning effective treatments and prohibiting the patients from getting access to these common and basic necessities, if their goal is to cure, heal and prevent disease and illnesses? All of the evidence points to the vaccines as being the end game.

Lastly, I have to address Mr. Spence’s last quote: “And I got a lot of COVID nurses and friends that are saying the same thing, but they can’t speak out because they still have a house payment. And they’re really upset about this.”

I am going to be completely candid on this. This is part of why we are in the problem we’re in, is because of people not speaking out. Staying quiet and continuing to watch all of the murders going on, because that’s what it is, is making one complicit. If “you” are in the hospital/healthcare profession, and you KNOW what is going on in this world, and you don’t speak out or leave, because of your comforts (even if family is involved – I know it’s hard, but this is the testament of a true character – to rise up above corruption especially when it’s challenging), then that makes “you” an agent and a part of these heinous plans. This is what the globalists depend upon. People being too agreeable and afraid to speak out in order to live comfortably even at the cost of other’s well-being.

A very warm thank you to Mr. Albert Spence for doing the honorable thing and leaving the establishment, and speaking the truth for others to hear. Your bravery and integrity are incredibly needed in these uncertain times, and is much appreciated.

And thank you to Brian Shilhavy/Health Impact News/Global Research for reporting on these accounts.