I Yelled at God the Other Day.

A rant. And a heartfelt plea.

I’m a believer in God/Jesus Christ.

Does that mean that I don’t get frustrated and angry when I feel as if things aren’t progressing as much as I’d like?

No, not at all. The other day was a prime example.

Now, I know the world doesn’t revolve around me and what I’d like. And I know I shouldn’t put expectations upon God/the Creator and what His plans are for the world. And I realize that I don’t understand all the intricacies that the universe has to offer.

But does that mean that I still won’t care and show emotions when there’s something that is so heart-wrenching, so terrible, so unfathomable, that the mere thought of it being possible makes me sick to my stomach and literally freezes me to the extent that I can’t move, and sends me down a spiral into depression and despair?

My heart physically hurts when I realize the true depths of evil and horror that some people will inflict on others, especially on children.

While researching the child-trafficking scandal and the new movie being released later this year, “The Sound of Freedom”, it really hit home for me the absolute deplorable actions that some people are engaged in, and the unbelievably depraved nature that certain individuals have been grown into and exposed to.

It ENRAGES me that God could allow something like this to happen. I have to reign myself in and reason that it’s not about God ALLOWING it, so much as it is, perhaps, God allowing us to make the choice on what we will do in such situations.

This goes back to the ideology of “free will”. And predetermination.

It’s largely believed that God is labeled as all-knowing and omnipotent. Which, as a lot of us have logically concluded, that God already KNOWS everything that is going to happen. He already KNOWS who’s going to Heaven and who’s going to Hell. He already KNOWS who will turn to Him and repent of their sinful, wicked ways. He already KNOWS whose names are written in the Book of Life.

So the whole prospect of us living this life already has a set conclusion.

At least, that’s what I always thought. In some cases, I still do. Again, I want to reiterate that I can’t know to understand the mysteries of the universe and the ultimate plan for our being. But I CAN continuously pray to have that understanding and enlightening revelation, and pray that God will speed up His supreme sovereignty and establish His presence so that PEACE can triumph upon the world.

I want the suffering to end.

While I, myself, have led a relatively painless life, my heart is literally torn when I contemplate upon the suffering and torture that others have had to endure. I want their suffering to end. The only way I see that happening is if Jesus returns. Or if there is a world-wide attempt of the public at large, changing/warming our hearts and treating each other better, and realizing that Love is the answer.

When I read about cults initiating a specific mind-control regime in order to produce loyal, obedient, equally as twisted individuals to perpetuate this on-going cycle and create even more corrupted subjects, thus spreading this mentality across the land, it’s no wonder that the world is in the state it’s in.

Svali Speaks (a dark, disturbing look into what cult-indoctrination looks like)
Svali Interview | Interview on Illuminati Bloodlines with Svali (shocking and horrific testimony about groups involved in ritual abuse – Vatican is indicated)

These cults and other disturbed individuals (perhaps having grown up in a highly dysfunctional environment in some cases), are raised into a perverted, immoral establishment that actually teaches sinful and unsympathetic behavior. They have fine-tuned this process over centuries, even millenia – as far back as ancient civilization times. The Bible mentions these groups, and while a lot of us believe that these wicked practices and rituals no longer exist, we couldn’t be further from the truth. They are just more hidden (in plain sight, I should add).

It brings some to wonder, if these ancient civilizations and cultures never ceased their evil ways (spanning generations from even during Jesus’ lifetime and beyond), and that they’ve held on to their resentment of God and Jesus Christ this whole time, it begins to paint the picture of the heinous activity going on today that these same people have preserved and passed down onto their own descendants, to carry out upon the rest of the population.

Which brings me to the only conclusions that can be done to overdo this activity. That of us fellow human beings breaking out of this dichotomy – especially those under the spell of this corrupt organization(s), and/or Jesus Christ’s return.

And so I pray. I pray for people to wake up, I pray for them to have a change of heart – that they will see the errors of their ways and repent.

And most of all, I pray, every single night and every opportunity I get, for Jesus Christ to return.

There is one particular Bible verse that I go back to over and over again, and cling onto in the hopes that it will come true, and SOON.

22 And except those days should be shortened, there should no flesh be saved: but for the elect's sake those days shall be shortened.
Matthew 24:22

I don’t know who the “elect” are, but that’s not the word that intrigues me. I’m interested in the word “shortened”. This implies that the suffering of people will be cut short because of the elect’s sake. Which makes me beg the question, “When is enough, enough?”

How much more will people and young children suffer in order to get God’s attention?

And so, in a fit of frustration and rage, I demanded God/Jesus Christ to “GET DOWN HERE!
Repeatedly… So much so, that I could literally feel the static pounding in my head when getting really, really angry. Something I hadn’t felt in quite awhile.

I know. Rather blasphemous and condescending – to demand that Jesus Christ finally show Himself and heal people’s suffering and enact His judgment and justice upon the world. But I honestly don’t want anything else.

…Well, after my rude and arrogant outburst, I did beg for forgiveness and felt shameful and remorse for my audacity, but honestly, the sentiment still remains. I want Jesus Christ’s Second Coming to happen SOON, and by “soon”, I don’t mean 20 years from now. I mean NOW. Right NOW.

I’ve mentioned before about perhaps my will infringing upon other people’s free will (they don’t want a change of heart – they don’t want to change – they don’t want Jesus to return…), but for certain people to manipulate and torture/abuse others – therefore perhaps infringing upon their free will, I am working outside of this projected system and declaring that MY will, is God’s will. His will is just and divine, so ultimately His decision is what I want to happen. If free will is something that even God Himself cannot (or will not) interfere with, then to be fair, people will be responsible for their own demise.

If people are engaging in evil, sinful acts, even if they don’t realize that it’s evil/sinful – I truly believe that God gives them opportunities to turn away from this lifestyle, and into one of repentance and forgiveness. I believe He gives us all several opportunities to pursue a life of light and love. And if we don’t, then we essentially doom ourselves.

And as to why this life has been carried out so long if God knows the final outcome of everyone’s decisions and path that they lead, I honestly don’t have a good answer. The Bible always alludes to the fact that this divine plan needs to happen this way. I don’t know why; I don’t know to what purpose. Perhaps it’ll all be clear when I’m finally on my deathbed and glimpsing into the great beyond.

Until then, I will continue to pray and spread awareness. And continue this ever prevalent pursuit of Truth. And hope that Jesus Christ comes soon and helps to bring peace and justice upon the world.

If you’re on the wrong side, I pray for you and hope you come to see the light before it’s too late. I believe that God WILL forgive you, if you truly repent. God is Love and wants nothing more than for people to find this Love – pure, unconditional, untainted Love that cares for others. But hurting/abusing others is NOT pure Love and will not be able to co-exist with the holy divine. We make our own choices. A tragic, horror-filled darkness with excessive pain that we’ve inflicted upon others, come back to haunt us for eternity; or a free, joyful, glorious world that is filled with Love and happiness.

For those who have stepped out of this darkness and horrible indoctrination of ritual abuse, you are more courageous and radiant than you realize. You are the beacon of hope that shines in this world, and gives us the strength and virtue to look forward to a brighter future. God bless you.

Fact checking is extremely important. I want to reiterate not to take everything at face value; no matter what you read, where you read it from, or who you hear it from. And to be clear, do not rely on “fact checking” websites to give you accurate information either. These are just as likely, (if not even more likely…), to feed false information and false debunking accounts to manipulate the reader. Please take everything into consideration before adhering to a certain narrative – and always keep your mind open to other possibilities.

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Featured image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Why is Love so Important?

Imagine a world with, and without Love. What do you see?

Hello Dear Readers,

If you’ve been to this site before, then you might realize a big focus that I address is that Love is the most important thing in the universe. I talk about it a lot. And it’s actually really hard for me to talk about on a day like today, for instance.

By the way, Happy Thanksgiving.
 

I’m not sure how everybody else is, but before, when I was still in my bitter, pessimistic days, it used to be really hard for me to say “I love you.” I might have gotten this reluctance to say it from my Mother. Don’t get me wrong, I adored her and loved her. But I think because she rarely ever said it, it must have rubbed off on me and I patterned myself after her in that regard.

It wasn’t until September 2007, that for some reason, while driving my Mom to work, I felt compelled to tell my Mom that I love her. I don’t even know where this sudden feeling came from. It just occurred to me that I couldn’t remember the last time I said, “I love you” to anyone. She looked shocked, because I think she realized it too, and she said “I love you” back. There was a feeling of imminent foreshadowing in that moment, and I instantly knew that something was different.

I remember it was September of 2007 very specifically, because, maybe ironically, the very next month she was diagnosed with cancer. And the next month after that, on Thanksgiving Day, she passed away.

I remember feeling lost, confused, hurt… losing someone on Thanksgiving Day; a day where family is traditionally supposed to come together and unite in a “happy” feast and reunion, and giving thanks to God for His blessings and of bountiful harvests.

It was a bitter reminder to me that practically during my whole life, I was ungrateful and unappreciative of the people in my life – or at least, I didn’t show my appreciation. Perhaps on the inside I knew how blessed I really was, but instead I chose to remain in the negativity and resentment of whatever teenage and early twenties angst I was focusing on at the time.

For what reason?

In my mind, I felt that the world was a lost cause. I saw injustices and hatred everywhere I turned. Selfishness, greediness, uncaring, hateful souls… My heart was turning black, cold, becoming “hardened”. It wasn’t until an event a few years earlier did a light suddenly go off in me and I started changing my ways. But even then, it still took more divine interventions to change my heart into following God and Love.

And although I did blame God for a time for taking my Mother from me just when I started to realize how little I was appreciating the people in my life, did it finally occur to me that it was my fault. I had the choice to appreciate my loved ones from the beginning or not. I had the choice to just assume they knew how much I loved them even though I didn’t tell them that or show them. It was my choice to be cold and distant instead of warm and loving.

Thankfully, with what I believe to be God’s help, He didn’t give up on me and He continued to work on me. I was the lost cause in this story. But He still saved me. He showed me that “Love is the Answer”.

And my heart goes out to anyone who has gone through life without Love. Sadly, some grow up in a household or living conditions without Love shown to them. And this is absolutely heartbreaking. The thing is, even though it may not seem like it, you are still loved. There are many people that have love and compassion for every being on this planet. And although there are atheists that don’t believe in God and there are pagan worshippers, idolaters, etc., it is my belief that God/Jesus still loves them. Regardless if one believes in them or not.

The only thing Jesus asks of us, is that we love God, love each other and ourselves, as Jesus Himself loves us.

That’s it.

And here’s the thing. If we did that, then we wouldn’t be living with hatred, division, greed, etc. If we all loved each other like we should, all of us would be happy and care about each other. And we would appreciate each other and not take each other for granted.

This is the world that I envision. I can see it and I can feel it in my heart. But we need to work on ourselves and work on the Love we have within. No, we cannot expect others to change. We can hope, love and pray for them, but we do have control over our own lives and our own emotions. We have the power to allow ourselves to realize that Unconditional Love is the most important thing in the universe and to act upon that and put it in motion. Love others, love your enemies, love everyone… and that will change the world.

Depiction of the world we would have with and without love.

Altered with combined images from Reimund Bertrams and Pexels from Pixabay (and added text).

Now, I’d like to say that I learned my lesson. I catch myself saying “I love you” to my son often. Not out of mindless habit, but simply because the love I feel for him is so overwhelming and I truly want him to know that I love him dearly. I say “I love you” to my friends and other members of my family. I say “I love you” to animals. I pray to God/Jesus and the Heavenly host and thank them all and tell them that I love them. I love the world and the beauty that it holds.

And on that note, I love you all, and I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. If I may ask of you anything, it is to simply love others, and be thankful and show appreciation for the ones you have in your life. Don’t wait until it’s too late.

Love and blessings to you all.

Featured image by Glegle from Pixabay

Crystal Clear Learning

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