I Yelled at God the Other Day.

A rant. And a heartfelt plea.

I’m a believer in God/Jesus Christ.

Does that mean that I don’t get frustrated and angry when I feel as if things aren’t progressing as much as I’d like?

No, not at all. The other day was a prime example.

Now, I know the world doesn’t revolve around me and what I’d like. And I know I shouldn’t put expectations upon God/the Creator and what His plans are for the world. And I realize that I don’t understand all the intricacies that the universe has to offer.

But does that mean that I still won’t care and show emotions when there’s something that is so heart-wrenching, so terrible, so unfathomable, that the mere thought of it being possible makes me sick to my stomach and literally freezes me to the extent that I can’t move, and sends me down a spiral into depression and despair?

My heart physically hurts when I realize the true depths of evil and horror that some people will inflict on others, especially on children.

While researching the child-trafficking scandal and the new movie being released later this year, “The Sound of Freedom”, it really hit home for me the absolute deplorable actions that some people are engaged in, and the unbelievably depraved nature that certain individuals have been grown into and exposed to.

It ENRAGES me that God could allow something like this to happen. I have to reign myself in and reason that it’s not about God ALLOWING it, so much as it is, perhaps, God allowing us to make the choice on what we will do in such situations.

This goes back to the ideology of “free will”. And predetermination.

It’s largely believed that God is labeled as all-knowing and omnipotent. Which, as a lot of us have logically concluded, that God already KNOWS everything that is going to happen. He already KNOWS who’s going to Heaven and who’s going to Hell. He already KNOWS who will turn to Him and repent of their sinful, wicked ways. He already KNOWS whose names are written in the Book of Life.

So the whole prospect of us living this life already has a set conclusion.

At least, that’s what I always thought. In some cases, I still do. Again, I want to reiterate that I can’t know to understand the mysteries of the universe and the ultimate plan for our being. But I CAN continuously pray to have that understanding and enlightening revelation, and pray that God will speed up His supreme sovereignty and establish His presence so that PEACE can triumph upon the world.

I want the suffering to end.

While I, myself, have led a relatively painless life, my heart is literally torn when I contemplate upon the suffering and torture that others have had to endure. I want their suffering to end. The only way I see that happening is if Jesus returns. Or if there is a world-wide attempt of the public at large, changing/warming our hearts and treating each other better, and realizing that Love is the answer.

When I read about cults initiating a specific mind-control regime in order to produce loyal, obedient, equally as twisted individuals to perpetuate this on-going cycle and create even more corrupted subjects, thus spreading this mentality across the land, it’s no wonder that the world is in the state it’s in.

Svali Speaks (a dark, disturbing look into what cult-indoctrination looks like)
Svali Interview | Interview on Illuminati Bloodlines with Svali (shocking and horrific testimony about groups involved in ritual abuse – Vatican is indicated)

These cults and other disturbed individuals (perhaps having grown up in a highly dysfunctional environment in some cases), are raised into a perverted, immoral establishment that actually teaches sinful and unsympathetic behavior. They have fine-tuned this process over centuries, even millenia – as far back as ancient civilization times. The Bible mentions these groups, and while a lot of us believe that these wicked practices and rituals no longer exist, we couldn’t be further from the truth. They are just more hidden (in plain sight, I should add).

It brings some to wonder, if these ancient civilizations and cultures never ceased their evil ways (spanning generations from even during Jesus’ lifetime and beyond), and that they’ve held on to their resentment of God and Jesus Christ this whole time, it begins to paint the picture of the heinous activity going on today that these same people have preserved and passed down onto their own descendants, to carry out upon the rest of the population.

Which brings me to the only conclusions that can be done to overdo this activity. That of us fellow human beings breaking out of this dichotomy – especially those under the spell of this corrupt organization(s), and/or Jesus Christ’s return.

And so I pray. I pray for people to wake up, I pray for them to have a change of heart – that they will see the errors of their ways and repent.

And most of all, I pray, every single night and every opportunity I get, for Jesus Christ to return.

There is one particular Bible verse that I go back to over and over again, and cling onto in the hopes that it will come true, and SOON.

22 And except those days should be shortened, there should no flesh be saved: but for the elect's sake those days shall be shortened.
Matthew 24:22

I don’t know who the “elect” are, but that’s not the word that intrigues me. I’m interested in the word “shortened”. This implies that the suffering of people will be cut short because of the elect’s sake. Which makes me beg the question, “When is enough, enough?”

How much more will people and young children suffer in order to get God’s attention?

And so, in a fit of frustration and rage, I demanded God/Jesus Christ to “GET DOWN HERE!
Repeatedly… So much so, that I could literally feel the static pounding in my head when getting really, really angry. Something I hadn’t felt in quite awhile.

I know. Rather blasphemous and condescending – to demand that Jesus Christ finally show Himself and heal people’s suffering and enact His judgment and justice upon the world. But I honestly don’t want anything else.

…Well, after my rude and arrogant outburst, I did beg for forgiveness and felt shameful and remorse for my audacity, but honestly, the sentiment still remains. I want Jesus Christ’s Second Coming to happen SOON, and by “soon”, I don’t mean 20 years from now. I mean NOW. Right NOW.

I’ve mentioned before about perhaps my will infringing upon other people’s free will (they don’t want a change of heart – they don’t want to change – they don’t want Jesus to return…), but for certain people to manipulate and torture/abuse others – therefore perhaps infringing upon their free will, I am working outside of this projected system and declaring that MY will, is God’s will. His will is just and divine, so ultimately His decision is what I want to happen. If free will is something that even God Himself cannot (or will not) interfere with, then to be fair, people will be responsible for their own demise.

If people are engaging in evil, sinful acts, even if they don’t realize that it’s evil/sinful – I truly believe that God gives them opportunities to turn away from this lifestyle, and into one of repentance and forgiveness. I believe He gives us all several opportunities to pursue a life of light and love. And if we don’t, then we essentially doom ourselves.

And as to why this life has been carried out so long if God knows the final outcome of everyone’s decisions and path that they lead, I honestly don’t have a good answer. The Bible always alludes to the fact that this divine plan needs to happen this way. I don’t know why; I don’t know to what purpose. Perhaps it’ll all be clear when I’m finally on my deathbed and glimpsing into the great beyond.

Until then, I will continue to pray and spread awareness. And continue this ever prevalent pursuit of Truth. And hope that Jesus Christ comes soon and helps to bring peace and justice upon the world.

If you’re on the wrong side, I pray for you and hope you come to see the light before it’s too late. I believe that God WILL forgive you, if you truly repent. God is Love and wants nothing more than for people to find this Love – pure, unconditional, untainted Love that cares for others. But hurting/abusing others is NOT pure Love and will not be able to co-exist with the holy divine. We make our own choices. A tragic, horror-filled darkness with excessive pain that we’ve inflicted upon others, come back to haunt us for eternity; or a free, joyful, glorious world that is filled with Love and happiness.

For those who have stepped out of this darkness and horrible indoctrination of ritual abuse, you are more courageous and radiant than you realize. You are the beacon of hope that shines in this world, and gives us the strength and virtue to look forward to a brighter future. God bless you.

Fact checking is extremely important. I want to reiterate not to take everything at face value; no matter what you read, where you read it from, or who you hear it from. And to be clear, do not rely on “fact checking” websites to give you accurate information either. These are just as likely, (if not even more likely…), to feed false information and false debunking accounts to manipulate the reader. Please take everything into consideration before adhering to a certain narrative – and always keep your mind open to other possibilities.

Fair use disclaimer: Some of the links from this article are provided from different sources/sites to give the reader extra information and cite the sources, but does not necessarily mean that I endorse the contents of the site itself. Additionally, I have tried to provide links to the contents that I used from other sites as an educational and/or entertainment means only; if you feel that any information deserves further citation or request to be clarified, please let me know through the contact page.

Featured image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Genesis 12: The Call of Abram

Earnest Examination

This series is presented as an honest, sincere look into the study of the Bible with my own personal theories, opinions, comments and that of others’ insights and research into what the verses could mean. I cannot claim one way or another that everything that I am stating is fact and the true meaning of what is meant in these verses.

To lay it out in a way that I can manage, I have highlighted the texts of verses that I either don’t understand or have a comment or question about in yellow. And the comments I’ve left beneath it will be of a smaller font and using brown text.

I would love it if you’d join me in this journey and if you have any insights and/or knowledge of these chapters/verses etc., please feel free to share with me and the other readers. Any chance to get a clearer understanding of the Bible and Jesus Christ would be welcomed with open arms.

Version used is from biblestudytools.com (NKJV) Genesis 12

The Call of Abram

1 Now the Lord had said to Abram: “Get out of your country, From your family And from your father’s house, To a land that I will show you.
2 I will make you a great nation; I will bless you And make your name great; And you shall be a blessing.
3 I will bless those who bless you, And I will curse him who curses you; And in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.”
This verse seems like a contradiction to me. First it says that “I will bless those who bless you”, and then, “I will curse him who curses you”, yet in the very next section it states, “and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.” …Doesn’t the last part of the sentence cancel out the first portion? Unless EVERYONE blesses Abram, then not all of the families on earth will be blessed. So this sounds a little confusing to me.
4 So Abram departed as the Lord had spoken to him, and Lot went with him. And Abram was seventy-five years old when he departed from Haran.
5 Then Abram took Sarai his wife and Lot his brother’s son, and all their possessions that they had gathered, and the people whom they had acquired in Haran, and they departed to go to the land of Canaan. So they came to the land of Canaan.
6 Abram passed through the land to the place of Shechem, as far as the terebinth tree of Moreh. And the Canaanites were then in the land.
7 Then the Lord appeared to Abram and said, “To your descendants I will give this land.” And there he built an altar to the Lord, who had appeared to him.
8 And he moved from there to the mountain east of Bethel, and he pitched his tent with Bethel on the west and Ai on the east; there he built an altar to the Lord and called on the name of the Lord.
9 So Abram journeyed, going on still toward the South.

Abram in Egypt

10 Now there was a famine in the land, and Abram went down to Egypt to dwell there, for the famine was severe in the land.
11 And it came to pass, when he was close to entering Egypt, that he said to Sarai his wife, “Indeed I know that you are a woman of beautiful countenance.
12 Therefore it will happen, when the Egyptians see you, that they will say, ‘This is his wife’; and they will kill me, but they will let you live.
I don’t understand the customs of each nation, but it’s interesting that Abram’s first instinct is that the Egyptians will kill him presumably to steal his wife from him. It’s also interesting to note that Abram is very well aware of his wife’s beauty, and it’s for this reason that he feels as if he would be looked at in hostility by the Egyptians simply for being the husband of a “beautiful” woman.
It’s also very telling that even during the birth of all the nations, that physical looks has so much influence on people’s lives. No one can help how they are born and what physical features they’re born with (or can they…?) so to automatically judge someone based on their looks seems like such a strange concept to me. Of course, if one were inclined to believe that to be born with physical beauty is a ‘blessing from the gods’ or good karma, etc. then I can see why people would feel as if “beautiful” people are blessed – but as we can see in today’s society, this is most certainly NOT TRUE, as even some of the most beautiful people are corrupted to the core. So it all boils down to what is aesthetically pleasing in someone’s eyes, and that they could ultimately care less what kind of personality the person has, as long as they’re beautiful.
This is, of course, not speaking for everyone, but just a mentality that some people hold.

13 Please say you are my sister, that it may be well with me for your sake, and that I may live because of you.”
Was this plan strictly coming from Abram? Was he going with his gut instinct? It seemed to work well, in the end, but it would be nice to know where this intuition came from. A voice outside of his own being? His own conscience? The Lord Himself? Well, it’s probably not the Lord since if it was so, then that would imply that the Lord directly told Abram to lie, and that’s not righteous or holy, correct? God is Truth, so it wouldn’t make sense for Him to guide someone else into lying.
14 So it was, when Abram came into Egypt, that the Egyptians saw the woman, that she was very beautiful.
15 The princes of Pharaoh also saw her and commended her to Pharaoh. And the woman was taken to Pharaoh’s house.
16 He treated Abram well for her sake. He had sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male and female servants, female donkeys, and camels.
Wow, so just because someone’s ‘sibling’ is BEAUTIFUL, they get to be treated like a “king” just to remain in good standing with the person they potentially want to pursue relationships with. Is that really what natural selection dictates? Do we not care what character a person has, but instead put all (most?) of our emphasis on looks?
17 But the Lord plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai, Abram’s wife.
So… I have a bone to pick with our Lord. It is apparent that the Lord can dictate to whom He sends curses and plagues down into. He aimed deliberately for Pharaoh’s kingdom and his house, all because Abram lied to the Pharaoh about Sarai being his sister instead of his wife and that Pharaoh made an honest mistake. According to this account. So here’s the clueless Pharaoh, not even realizing why he’s being plagued (and I’m not stating that the Pharaoh is completely innocent in this dealing, by the way, because like Abram stated, perhaps they really would have killed him if they had known right away that he was Sarai’s husband) and it makes me wonder how much the Pharaoh believes in the same Lord that Abram does.
So my problem with this ordeal is that for God to initiate this very targeted attack on the Pharaoh for picking on His blessed family, it implies that God can do this to whomever He wants, whenever He wants, and for whatever reason He wants. So to still allow incredibly evil acts to run rampant instead of ‘smiting’ or sending down plagues against corrupted individuals, when they do TRULY awful things, is a very severe oversight and the reason for a lot of people not believing in God. I went through this very same phase when I was younger, thinking that if God exists, how could He allow such evil to continue? Of course, we don’t know all the mysteries and plans involved in this strange world and in our lives, and that ‘free will’ plays a huge part in the way our world is run, but for an almighty God to literally send plagues to an Egyptian ruler simply because he was misled in believing that a particular woman is single, meanwhile millions of kids are starving to death and being sold/trafficked to truly horrendous people – the comparison doesn’t even make sense.

18 And Pharaoh called Abram and said, “What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife?
19 Why did you say, ‘She is my sister’? I might have taken her as my wife. Now therefore, here is your wife; take her and go your way.”

Even though lying is technically wrong, and satan himself is called Father of Lies, I’m wondering if there is truly a distinction between lying to manipulatively deceive someone, and lying for ‘the better good’. Abram’s lie was to protect himself because he knew, somehow, that he would be on the chopping block if the Egyptians realized that he was Sarai’s husband. And in so doing, he was also protecting Sarai from being kidnapped, essentially, to an unknown life that she may not be accustomed to or appreciate. So it does bring up the question if it’s ever okay to lie.
Some people bring up the fact that one of the 10 commandments is “Thou shall not lie”, but that’s not exactly what it says or implies. The actual commandment is, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor”. Meaning we shouldn’t slander or lie about our neighbor’s (fellow peoples) deeds. However, since Jesus Christ is “the Way, the Truth, and the Life”, it goes without saying that probably the best way to maintain righteousness is to stay in Truth. After all, if Abram was already being looked out for by God Himself, then Abram very well could have told the truth that he is Sarai’s husband, and no matter what the Egyptians tried to do to him, it wouldn’t pan out for them anyway.

20 So Pharaoh commanded his men concerning him; and they sent him away, with his wife and all that he had.

This was a very interesting look into the relationship between God and Abram, and how much the Lord really did to protect Abram and Sarai from possible subjugation of the Egyptians. It does bring up to question though if God still works this way on a personal level like He did back in these biblical times. And if He is working this way, perhaps many of us just don’t know about it.

As usual, I want to reiterate that some of my thoughts and theories may be way off base, and I also research some other things on the side as well to try and get a broader understanding of what I’m reading, so please bear with me, or, even better, if you have insights that bring more light to these verses, please let me know.

I enjoy bouncing off theories and theology off of each other and love to hear other people’s perspectives on things. Thank you for reading and I look forward to hearing from you!

Fact checking is extremely important. I want to reiterate not to take everything at face value; no matter what you read, where you read it from, or who you hear it from. And to be clear, do not rely on “fact checking” websites to give you accurate information either. These are just as likely, (if not even more likely…), to feed false information and false debunking accounts to manipulate the reader. Please take everything into consideration before adhering to a certain narrative – and always keep your mind open to other possibilities.

Fair use disclaimer: Some of the links from this article are provided from different sources/sites to give the reader extra information and cite the sources, but does not necessarily mean that I endorse the contents of the site itself. Additionally, I have tried to provide links to the contents that I used from other sites as an educational and/or entertainment means only; if you feel that any information deserves further citation or request to be clarified, please let me know through the contact page.

Featured image by Gnattyone from Pixabay